I Can't Just Slap This Post On The Internet Like A Bumper Sticker Full Of Ill-Conceived Grammatical Errors. It Needs Content. Or Maybe Just A Punch Line With Myself Firmly Attached To The Butt Of It.

This is not a real post, but if I push the publish button, then, I'll feel like I've accomplished something, because apparently cleaning the kitchen, doing 7 loads of laundry, volunteering at two elementary schools, and standing in the cold with my kids selling Girl Scout cookies isn't doing it for me this week. Plus writing is hard. And I ran out of coffee. And then it was time to pick the kids up from school.

(Note: Insert more creative excuse here. Maybe one including a chinchilla, a turtle and a big bowl of chili. Note on the note: Adopt a chinchilla and a turtle and convince the kids they actually like chili to add believability to the excuse. Note on the note on the note: This is turning out to be harder than the actual writing work. Plus, let's face it, I'm never going to convince the children they like chili. I'm gonna have to fake that.)


I ran a 15k on Sunday, and, at the 10k point my kids and Jon were standing on the sidelines, ready to cheer me on! Ellie even ran out onto the course to give me a high five! So cute! And then? I had this conversation with a fellow runner:

Me: (high fiving Ellie after veering to the curb so she isn't bowled over by 4,000 runners)
Guy in Shorts: (from really close behind me) Hey! You stole my high five!
Me: (with my sweaty incredulous face) Uh, no. I made that girl. She totally owes me.
Guy in Shorts: But I need it more than you!
Me: (22 minutes later, looking over my shoulder, as I kick through the finish chute) Yeah, ya' did.

What really happened:

Me: (high fiving Ellie after veering to the curb so she isn't bowled over by 4,000 runners)
Guy in Shorts: (from really close behind me) Hey! You stole my high five!
Me: (with my sweaty incredulous face) Uh, no. (gesture awkwardly toward uterus) I made that girl. She totally owes me.
Guy in Shorts: But I need it more than you!
Me: (30 minutes later, looking way ahead of me as Guy in Shorts is downing a bottle of water with his race medal around his neck I gasp through the finish chute) Dude...you're such a liar!

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